Fatlo.af

I ask the question because I thought it was something that needed to be asked, not because someone I know has recently acquired one and has absolutely no justification for it except for shooting stationary objects. I feel its an important question that all of us need to ask ourselves, I believe it is key to the growth of our physical being. And I want to see if anyone can actually justify it.

A bow and arrow, definitely, hunting or competition stuff. A gun/rifle, again, hunting, competition related activities, but a crossbow? That’s like the middle child of a 3 child family, noone wants to acknowledge them but they still have to give them something to do.

With PJ’s wedding looming larger than life (about 36hrs now until the fateful event), he’s been totally useless this week in doing anything apart from finishing work or organising wedding rehearsals, its been a struggle for him to do that too.

Funnily enough he gets angry at the slightest push these days, its quite amusing.

We had a rehearsal during the week for this apparent matrimonial ceremony we’ll be attending this weekend. To Gavin and my credit, I thought we were fairly well behaved, Paul didn’t think so. Of course, that didn’t help matters any because well, Paul as an authorative figure just doesn’t work for me, Bill maybe, not Paul. So Gav and I did the only decent thing, we upped the stress factor for Paul by making stupid suggestions and betting each other a dollar to do something stupid at every opportunity. I felt we lived up to the mook name by doing so.

Paul keep crying “just one day, please be normal”, except he couldn’t seem to grasp that the rehearsal wasn’t “his day”, his day was on Saturday. Tuesday was ours.

So, as far as rehearsals go, we’re going to get in so much trouble on Saturday. Don’t tell Paul though, its a secret.

Last weekend seemed to be filled with birthday’s and barbeques, maybe it was a theme I missed out on. My Dad’s 62nd birthday was on Friday so we (by we I mean family, not the previous we which was the bridal party, try to keep up) took him out for dinner for indian and enjoyed it immensely. I organised him a Bunnings voucher because well, there was probably something GMC had released that he didn’t own. Much like Bill and his cordless DeWalt tool collection. In fact, if you happen to be at the wedding on Saturday, ask Bill about them, its well worth it.

After this dinner I scooted off to Athelstone to play some Texas Hold’em at a fellow gym members place. As always a good night of cards was had. I didn’t leave there until about 2am which was good because I didn’t want to get much sleep anyway.

On Monday of this week Yasmin had her birthday but held a bit of a party at her place on Saturday night, I didn’t get there until late because, well, I could. Yasmin was well and truly ticking along by that stage so the entertainment at her inherent stupid acts was well worth the trip. It was also good to see her again.

I took the soon to be newlywed couple, Kylie and PJ out for dinner on Monday night, being that it was quite possibly the last time to do so for quite some time I thought it pertinent. We went to the Bombay Bicycle Club for one of the nicest curries around. Paul actually started to sweat the moment his Tindaloo hit his fork, his forehead glistened straight away. My Vindaloo was a bit quieter than that, waiting for me to let me guard down and then slapping me about like a little bitch. It’s very emasculating to be beaten by what is essentially a stewed cow with some spice attached. I did get through it and it was so very nice but lets just say it was warm. While it hit me the next day it wasn’t until the same group plus Gavin had “all you can eat mexican” the following night that Paul experienced what I’ve now termed Johnny Cash Syndrome.

Has anyone ever injured themselves putting up xmas lights? A guy at work here has, now normally this wouldn’t be funny but let me explain. He and his fiance bought some lights, put them up successfully outside their northern suburbs house and all was good. Early the following day he noticed his neighbour across the road had done the same sort of thing but had gone a little further. To a normal person this wouldn’t have mattered and the whole exercise in the stupidity of xmas lights would have ended but as it turned out, he wasn’t normal. After the little Clark Griswold (all you National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation fans out there know what I’m talking about) inside him came alive he went to town on his house, ladening it with many a xmas light. It all came to a head when he injured his shoulder while putting more fucking lights on his roof, it probably took the count up to about 3.5 gajillion little flashing lights. Easily mistakable for a spot light when viewed from space. Anyone who goes that far for xmas lights needs to get a hobby, or at least something to keep them occupied during that time.

I just wanted to issue a warning to anyone who comes across the fly epidemic thats going around, if you’re in the northern suburbs the larger flies, which seem to grow as big as mandarin’s, can leave bruises and cause bodily injury if you are in their way. Don’t drive through them, they are like baseballs if you hit them at speed. Don’t get me started on the mosquito’s, they are the size of small dogs and from what I can understand they travel in packs and can, at will, take down babies and small children gorging themselves until they are in a drunken stupor. Even full grown people are at risk. Just watch out.

Seriously though, there’s a fucking lot of flies out there this year and its very annoying. From what I understand its to do with the flooding we had which has caused all the growers in Virginia to abandon crops and just let them rot there. Flies, as a rule, love that. This has obviously created a breed of superflies, not at all related to the movie, Superfly although that would be cool.

Anyway, I think thats enough for now, as you may have read, PJ is using this place as a sepository for all tales related to his European jaunt. I’ve created a place in the wiki for him, lets hope he uses it.