Fatlo.af

im not so sure that i share scotts passion for this tournament, but further to the post of scotts i have to pass comment yes i’ve taken the bait!

as mentioned in the post of scott this weekend is the start of the annual under 25′s tournament. and yes the countdown has begun.. scott turns into a little boy at this time of year, like one of those ones that you see on christmas day that runs into their parents room and jumps on the bed saying “wake up! wake up! father christmas has been” he would still do that too if he didnt break his parents bed last year doing that exact thing! anyway he seems to get a high level of satisfaction at taunting me and reminding me about his sucess last year, how quickly he forgets previous years

i really didnt think he would stoop as low as to use this medium to begin this years trash talking shitfest.. subjecting all you loyal people to this, is just not right. but like one of those jealous kids on christmas that didnt get the barbie doll that he wanted and picks a fight with his sister who did get it, cuz she waved it in his face im gunna say he started it and continue with the trash talking that between scott and myself have made an additional sport sidelining to the actual game at hand! in the last couple of years scott and i have taken this to a whole new level, mainly because we are both bloody huge and we can. many of the other bowlers try to compete with the two titans of trash talking but always fall short of the challenge, usually they end up in a corner rocking and talking to themselves trying to think of happy thoughts, or they realise early that they have bitten of more than they can chew and withdraw to sit back and watch the masters go at it! it can become entertaining, heated and just downright abusive between us as we struggle to get the upper hand in the psycological warfare that trash talking now is! so if your not intrested in the sport of bowling come down and watch the OTHER sport of TRASH TALKING!

im not sure i share this same passion for this tournament as scott as it has been a thorn in myside for the last two years. for those of you who arent in the know two years ago i wasnt selected for the state youth team, as the highest ranked youth bowler in australia, (from s.a.) four others were chosen over me that year (scott was one of them! bastard) i think that had something to do with my trash talking of a junior.. but he deserved it. and i chose the 2002 under 25′s to prove they had made a mistake in not selecting me. from here things went from bad to worse.. I went out that year to win two bronze medals and finish higher than everyone that they had selected to represent the state earlier that year. after the tournament was complete the governing body of bowling (T.B.A) found a ball in my bag that i hadnt used was illegal, this gave them the chance to get back at me for telling them all they had no idea earlier in the year and they proceeded to strip me of the two bronze medals i had won and disqualify me from bowling in the grand final (masters) during the week leading up to masters multiple protests were lodged and the TBA over turned thier ruling and allowed me to compete at masters but wouldnt reinstate my medals. i went out the following weekend to win silver in masters and prove them all wrong once again. the following year was at norwood, now i hate this centre with a passion and carrying the scares from the previous year and trying to be competitive in a centre that i didnt want to be in got the better of me. (oh and scotts trash talking ofcouse) i also was working until 4am everynight and getting up at 7am to bowl which im sure ill be doing again this year as my boss wont give me the time off! so lack of sleep, hating the bowling centre and the emotional trauma of the year before all played a part in me not bowling well (this is where you all sigh and say poor guy) or you can just say sucked in you moaning bitch get on with it, but that wouldnt be very nice. so im presuming your all sighing. ahhhh..

anyway time to give the big man some of his own medicine! yes im bowling for lizbef! i have bowled for them for 3 of the last four years last year i too was lured to represent norwood by their lucrative offers, (they pay for everything and had nice shirts) trust me looking good is half the game in bowling, the other half is divided into two quarters, leaving high scoring and TRASH TALKING to make up the remainder of the equation, just ask scott about my shoes he’ll tell ya how nice they are any way yes i bowled for norwood and didnt make the masters final so i have returned to the ghetto i call home to get back in touch with the people and where ripple soled shoes torn jeans and a tank top that one of the mums has written the team name on in fat texta is the uniform, this is also the place where broken knee caps or a missing person will only cost me a packet of fags, so listen here you little upstart snobs, pull ya freeekin heads in or i just might make your team show up one short or short one arm (hope he gets the bowling arm)

ok yes scott, you won some gold last year, it was only a little bit and the year before as i recall you didnt make the masters final either, if a pattern is evolving i guess that would mean that im due for gold this year and scott for nothing??
and scooter dont forget i was the first to take home the silver masters medal, me 2002 you the year after 2003 i guess it comes down to the holy grail to define the greatest lefty of the two, the 2004 gold medal in masters! maybe next year we will bowl on the same team and combine our forces for good rather than the evil toward each other but that would be no fun for the readers..

anyway peoples i know im now leaving you licking your lips and wanting more… so stay posted, no doubt updates will follow

im now of to listen to some self help tapes and to organise a hit

always remember to work hard and be good to your mother.